Videos, not Viruses

So we made a few videos promoting our wine as being a willing partner for Turkey (not to mention, sweet potatoes, kale, mashed potatoes, etc - the full Thanksgiving repast) and have posted it on YouTube. I'll provide the link at then end of the post - everyone stops reading right now and goes to bottom - but I'm sure you all want to read about the experience.

I strapped my video camera and tripod and a few bottles of Pinot and some glasses to my Trusty BMW R1100R motorcycle - a true friend of mine (Barry Michael Winegarten, born 11/94) - and headed out to the pre-arranged location for my shoot, The Goffle Road Poultry Farm in Wyckoff, New Jersey, famous for being the town that spat out the Jonas Brothers and also years ago was in the spotlight for breeding a pair of teens who dumped their newborn in a dumpster after the prom. Babies are so interfering in teenage matters. This poultry farm also happens to be 10 minutes from my childhood home in Ridgewood, NJ and I have passed it countless times but never have gone in. According to the owners it's been there for 80 years and "ain't going anywhere." Love grandfathered stuff.

After the owner took me to the Turkey pen, he left and I was left to get my equipment sorted and do some test shots. All was looking good when who shows up? My parents. Andy and Sandy. Me: "What the fuck are you guys doing here?" Them: "We wanted to annoy the shit out of you." Me: "Perfect. Thanks." Them: "Well,our work is done here, we'll see you later." And they left after ascertaining exactly how long I was going to be having sex with the Turkeys. I assured them that Turkey sex was a pretty quick thing and that I'd be available to have chili dogs (texas wieners) with them in one half hour. They left and the owner/Turkey wrangler returned.

A turkey was hooked by the ankle, though turkeys don't really have discernable ankles, and brought out of the pen to frolic with Otto. Then the Turkey freaked out and tried to attack me. The owner instructed me to "protect your eyes. They go for the eyes." Fucking turkeys know how to fight! Damn!

I decided that going into the pen full of Turkeys with the wine was the only way to get it done. So I climbed into the wall-to-wall, shit-carpeted pen with camera and wine. The turkeys immediately formed a phalanx and attacked me with all their might. In a blur of talons and beaks I managed to shoot the videos you're about to see. I ended up with 36 stitches mostly in my face, but I look tougher and got some great stuff on tape. Hope it sells some wine!

Otto Videos

The Perfect Fall Chronograph

Not sure what it is about Fall, but the first cool day with dappled sunshine really gets me excited for a few things: vintage flannel hunting jackets, braised meats, pinot noir (OCD, natch), the smell of decaying leaves, fireplaces, my annual Fall Classic ping pong tourney and vintage chronographs on leather bands. Has to be on a leather band. I'm going to get to all these excellent topics, particularly decaying leaves, at some point soon, but today I'm just going to speak of my favorite vintage chronograph:


Why chronographs in the fall? Simple - I've worn divers all summer and now it's time to give a more complex and sometimes colorful face a rotation in with outfits that are layered and more complex than my summer uniform of urban camo Speedos, wife-beater, heavy gold chain with horn and vintage Bally loafers - I do get a lot of compliments on this outfit! So with the cooler temps, I am able to dig into my collection of sweaters, 40s work boots, denim and chambray and of course my beloved Belstaff Trialmaster jacket - nothing goes better with this gear than a vintage chronograph and when I say vintage, I don't mean vintage looking, I mean a real-deal, mechanical chronograph watch made pre 1970s. I tend to favor stuff made during my birth decade - specifically 5 years previous to 5 years after my birth year which is 1971. During this time watch designer were doing some really cool stuff like making bigger cased watches to hold more functions, provide higher shock and water protection and ultimately just to look bad-ass. To wit, my 1978 Sicura Chronograph. Sporting an automatic Lemania caliber 1341 utilized by many marques of the era, it provides 1/5 second, minute and hour counter, up to 12 hours of continuous timing. Also on the dial at 9 is the seconds sweep, providing a running indication of the watches functioning and a nice visual reminder of the mechanical marvel toiling without complaint on your wrist - part of the appeal for me, that mechanical magic in the little package deal. For the uninitiated, an automatic movement, whether chronograph or not, utilizes a rotating weighted rotor that swings on a pivot, usually on the back of the movement. The swinging motion winds a coil spring that holds the power for the hands. The swinging motion is obviously provided by your movement, you sporting buck, you!

To really get the most out of your vintage chrono for the Fall, I highly recommend that you mount it on a rustic leather strap - either purchased or in my case, hand-made from leather from my dead Grandfather who ran a tannery in Port-au-Prince Haiti. Kind of makes my strap cooler than yours, doesn't it? I got my leather supplies in NYC - you don't need much to do this and most hobby shops have some of the tools you'll need. Google leather band making if you want some good instructions - I'll not bore you with my process that includes sage smudging a naked Koala bear to bless my leather studio (an ancient Aboriginal process I picked up during a spirit quest in the 80s). Enough words - here's some shots of my vintage Sicura chronograph on the G-Swamp (my hard-partying, cigar-smoking, little lothario of a grandfather's nickname) leather strap. FYI - the watch was purchased as-is on eBay for $275 and then brought back to life by all-around excellent man's man, musician and watchsmith, Lew Brown. Thanks Lew! Now where's that Pinot Noir...

Click on photos for larger version---->

New York's Underbelly Lives

I've long been a fan of the city, in all it's glory, and I've been exploring it by bicycle for literally 20 years (holy shit!). I must have ridden thousands of miles throughout most of the boroughs - the bronx and staten island just don't feel like part of the city I live in - and I've uncovered myriad gems in the rough and much rough thats gem-like in itself. The less sanitized parts of the city fascinate me the most because in a city where parts are worth $15 per square inch (that's $2000 per sq. ft. for those without a calculator handy), there seems to be fewer and fewer open areas of uncertain ownership. These areas generally become homeless feifdoms, attack dog training areas, shooting galleries, and art galleries as well. I like all of it. Hell, I love all of it. I love the sense of danger, the startling moment when that lump of rags moves and it's a person and when the rats literally confront you with a 'where the fuck do you think you're going?' look. Untethered dogs are by far the most dangerous aspect - you just can't reason with a dog unless you're holding a t-bone and I generally don't carry t-bones around with me, though it's not a bad idea. Today I started in a very industrial part of a borough which I will not mention because I don't want to just give it to you, budding urban spelunkers. Go out and look - these areas are not hard to find if you know the lay of the land to look for. Here's a look at my stroll through the urban art gallery I was so lucky to find this morning. PS: early morning is a good time to go, the drunks and junkies are generally passed out or just out looking for more. Do not carry anything terribly valuable with you unless you are willing to fight to keep it. Carrying ID is up to you - you're often trespassing when doing this and sometimes you will be questioned or arrested - I've never been arrested. If you have ID, you might get off the hook. If you don't, you'll probably definitely get arrested in post-9-11 New York. Another reason why these wastelands are so intriguing (the 9/11 lockdown has brought more fences and warnings). Anyway:

Texture and Perception

Sometimes I feel, as a designer, that I place an inordinate amount of importance on texture. While not dismissing the importance of texture in a number of design applications, I'm wondering just how important it is on a wine label? I think it's crazy important and is a huge indication of the perceived quality, though that's me. I wonder who else notices it? Most might notice it, but maybe just a few register an opinion on its value?

Textured paper is usually associated with fine art or vintage (estate) projects because older paper had more texture just by virtue of older paper making methodology and the ability to emboss in the final stages of paper production a pattern. Originally these textures and patterns where the natural markings of the drums over which the paper was turned or pressed, giving papers a unique imprint identifying the origin of the paper. This took on an elevated meaning when people started to associate the texture with the origin and could apply a value to the paper, ie: this came from the king's press! It must be important! This has carried over to today, even though the texture of paper is manufactured in a much more deliberate way, these days. I love old things that harken back to days of hand production and natural materials and equipment made by hand - adds a soulful appeal.

On another note, textured paper reflects light differently from un-textured paper. Usually matte finishes are used on textured paper to accentuate the absorbed light/saturated look. Colors look richer and lighting is not able to glare off the surface causing the viewer to have to adjust viewing angle to see the information on the label. I hate high gloss anything - shit, even Mac has realized how tacky high gloss is and moved their high-end laptops to the matte aluminum finish (just as the PC world starts churning out glossy colored laptops - hi, I'm a PC and I'm follower...).

Really, one need look further than the restaurant world to understand the difference - diners: plastic-coated menues in high-gloss (phony luxe) designed to be able to wipe the hoi polloi's errant ketchup from. Del Posto - offset printed ivory laid paper showing what's available today only - ooh la la. In the wine world: Monkey Bay - shiny labels that actually have gold and silver 'bling' on them: 50 cents in the bottle, 50 cents on the label - OCD Syrah - 25 cents on the label, history and a fortune in experience and care behind its deep purple, matte, textured label.

Wine & Chocolate - era defying decadence on the cheap

Stealth Wine Cellars

Spiral Cellar

While the copy says these can be installed in almost any home, I'm sure your downstairs neighbors and the co-op board may have a problem with your cast concrete tube of cellar in their living room. Ground floors are a must for installation as is probably being rich, like most of life's excesses, though for some, a wine cellar may be a must.

Those Damn Kiwis are stealing our Liberty, one spot at a time!

TRAVESTY

Really? I am shocked by this and I had no idea New Zealanders knew how to drive, honestly, let alone were allowed diplomatic privileges! For what? Though I suppose New York is a welcoming place to all and our small island friends should be no different. Though it will be odd when they've installed the mini-paddock for their beloved sheep to graze on 41st St.

Boggle, Punnery and the Bible.

Today I was beaten at Boggle (online) by the follwing people: Pastor of Muppets, Conan The Librarian, Mike Hunt Stinks, Jim Nasium, Bible Prophecy is True, Wordturd, Lynchie and most suspiciously and embarassingly by Michael Jackson's Nose. While it's good to hear that MJs nose did not get buried with him and has started a new life, it is a bit humbling to be beaten at Boggle by that white little upturned wisp of Silicone! I was much less surprised to be trounced by Conan The Librarian. Jim Nasium took the time to put a little trademark symbol by his name, but hey, I would too if I was smart enough to come up with such a delicious Boggle monicker (next stop, Hollywood!!!). Mike Hunt Stinks, while reeking of a classic 80s prank, happens to be a pretty decent boggler, for a 30 something stuck on 15. Pretty sad, Mike Hunt, whoever you are - you're wasting your talent man! Wake up! I already know that Bible Prophecy is True, so it was of little use o passive aggressively proselytize on the Boggle site, but hey BPiT, at least you beat the sneaky Wordturd (and me). Wordturd, I like your style - anyone who uses the word "turd" in any way, at any point during my day, is gonna get a thumbs up from this guy. Pastor of Muppets was dominating for a while, which is good, because Boggle is apparently important to him - up there with Metallica and the Muppets, two institutions I cannot find too much fault with, if any (though the Metallica documentary with their group therapist was VERY VERY UN-METAL. That leaves me with Lynchie - ranked 9th to my 10th on my last round today. While I'm sure it's just some guy named Jim Lynch from Merced, California, on-line, he sounds like the Grand Wizard of the KKK, and that ain't cool - especially cuz he beat me. Damn you lynchie. I gotta get a better name than ocdwine.com to play as, though I would be honored if Wordturd visited our website because of me.

Tasting at Cafe Nijasol tonight

Yo winos - tonight at the lovely open-air cafe Nijasol on Meserole street in East Williamsburg/Bushwick (I've no idea where the boundary might be, though it's probably Bushwick Avenue, which the cafe is West of, so prolly Williamsburg, really) - man these long parenthetical statements really screw up the flow - right, wine tasting, all OCD varietal plus free wine and cheese and the lovely company of Mylene and Tess. Some good music and a special appearance by David Lee Roth. During these economic times, I'd say free cheese to be dinner.

Friday Music Ramblings - important information for someone...

So I start my 4th day in a row, riding my mouse to design stardom through the wine world, listening happily to streaming radio on ITunes. Specifically, I've had a complete deep house renaissance. I spend many a early 90s college year deep in the bowels of various clubs in NYC, body rocking to the cacaphonous throb of deep house bass tracks in the company of a rather over the top club kid named Aristotle and my NYC business school bud, Pete B, aka Plastique - future rock star (not quite). Web radio is the best way to roll back a few years musically - one of the best things to happen to radio in general. So, if you, like me, enjoy the relatively melodic roll, bounce of true Deep House (excepting the occasional voiceover imploring you to "get on the spacecraft"), tune into Doggloungedeephouse under the Dance folder in Itunes radio. Now if I can only get the 5 musclebound gay dudes dancing in cutoff jeans who materialized in my office on the third day, to go home, things would be golden.

New Zealand and Australia on the brink of war

So, big news in the peaty stew that is Australasia (sp? care?) - New Zealand experienced a major earthquake a few days ago. I know you heard it on the news...what's that, you didn't hear about it on the news? Right, it's Australasia. Wait a second, I'm being provincial. Just cuz I live in America doesn't mean YOU live in America - you just live in our worldwide grasp. Sorry 'bout that. Maybe you should man up and invade someplace too! It's been a real boon for us. Anyway, right, earthquake in New Zealand. Well aside from a sharp decline in the price of sheep milkshakes for a day (sucked through a straw, natch) the big news is that En Zed is now 3o cm closer to Australia! Egad, what is one to do. Apparently they've been de-rusting the sheep cannons all along the coast (in En Zed) and parliament has been meeting non-stop to talk of the possible ramifications such as re-drawing the coastal water rights by 30cm on one side of the country and then hiring a mathmetician to figure out what to do on the opposite side of the island. What does it mean for Otto's Constant Dream? Well, since our shipping is 30cm less we are fully demanding a reduction in our shipping costs (though I fear it may be in the wrong direction so that might be 30cm more shipping). I should probably look at a map, but that would require some fact checking, and hell, this is the internet - if you type it, it's true.

MAN THE SHEEP CANNONS!!!!

OCD Wine Website Goes Live

Well, if you're one of the three people not including my mother-in-law who may be reading this, CONGRATULATIONS!, you've already been to our website (more than likely). This is good news! We thought that our brand of social networking - getting together, having dinner, drinking wine, playing croquet, going to the country, etc. was totally passé at this point, having been supplanted by spending one's time Facebooking, instead of face timing. Well, you can't share a bottle of wine over the internet, though I suppose you can both buy the same wine and sip it in your homes by your computers and discuss it over the internet - wow, that sounds like fun! I guess we're kind of old school and like to actually get together have the opportunity to say awful things to each other IN PERSON, when it really counts, unlike on the internet, where it's detached sport. Getting back to our website - hopefully, you can find something of interest on our site, whether about wines or ways to enjoy wine more. To that end we'd like to use the site to bring folks together in real time, in real life, to sip and share our love of wine. Check out the site and feel free to use the CONTACT US area to say those awful things that can't wait until we see each other in person.

Nanu Nanu

Of all the honors bestowed on us since we started spilling our wine into the gullets of the in-the-know people, this is a special night for this 80s TV kid. Otto's Constant Dream is the official wine of the 15th annual Mork & Mindy convention happening this evening in Boulder Colorado. Because of this our Chieftan and Fianance guru, Melissa and Dan are in Boulder to personally pour our Riesling and Syrah (mork & mindy, get it?) for the Nanu-heads in attendance (this year's record breaking evening squeezed 37 Nanu-heads out of the primordial ooze of America, the UK and Korea). Fun, light-hearted and with an unwavering moral compass OCD Riesling is the wine equivalent of Mork, obviously and our dark, dusky and difficult Mindy is Syrah all the way. However you slice it, Otto is amped to be part of this rarefied world!

Raise your glasses, wherever you are to Mork, Mindy, Dan, Melissa and all the Nanu-heads out there.

When Dumb People have Smart Phones

First off: do not panic. Dumb people are allowed to have all kinds of things, like children, in America, so smart phone ownership is NOT restricted here just to freelance design professionals. Anyone may have a smart phone. ANYONE! When they have this power in their hands, all manner of mayhem may be unleashed on those around them. I just thought I'd warn you. So there, you've been warned.

Wine is not, unfortunately, the opiate of the masses.

Should you wonder at all what is the true engine driving America, all you have to do is listen to the unbelievable rhetoric surrounding the switch to all digital TV. You would think, with all the turmoil and outright desperation plaguing our great country these days, the switch to digital TV would be a back burner issue - I mean, after all, who doesn't have cable and a flat screen, right? Isn't that what people bought with their subprime, overpumped piggy banks called houses? Apparently not. In fact the switch was such a big deal that Congress, yes that Congress passed an emergency measure to delay the switch to ensure that people had time to be ready. No man must be left behind!!! I mean really? Really? The buying and voting power of people who watch a static-filled Wheel of Fortune is so important that the federal government is bending over backwards to make sure they get their Vanna sans static? Wow. Losing your TV is far more important, apparently, if one is to use Katrina as a comparison, than losing ones life in America. While the US economy steamed headlong at full power toward catastrophe, Congress squabbled and preened. Thank god they've awoken to save Pat Sajack.

All I can say is, God, I LOVE this country!

Unisphere/Globitron - orbasmic!

OK - I'm going to go out on a limb here: I think the Unisphere in Flushing Meadow Park, Queens, is New York's most remarkable monument. It's actually better than a monument, it's a bold and beautiful bit of engineering, science as sculpture. Built for the 1964-5 World's Fair by the U.S. Steel Corporation, the Unisphere is 140 feet tall and weighs 900,000 lbs and is made entirely of lightweight STEEL. While not as beautiful as when it was first perched into the fountain, it is still one handsome son of a bitch and unlike most famous works of art, you can walk right up to it and climb it if you dare (some graffiti artists have gotten to the lower ring, but that's as far as they've dared). Uncharacteristically in our post 9/11 world, one can get as close to the Unisphere as they like. The fountain is ringed with skateboarders actually grinding on the rim of the fountain and the police don't even care! As a former skateboarder who's been chased by many a cop and security guard, I'm both happy for them and jealous. As a lover of old New York and it's treasures, I'm slightly appalled at how laissez-faire the park officials are at keeping the Unisphere protected. In the end, while I lazed literally directly under the Unisphere and ate my lunch today, I was happy it belonged to the people now. Does U.S. Steel even exist anymore? I don't think so. As I lounged in the shade of the Unisphere watching the hive of activity around me, planes departing from nearby La Guardia airport fly directly over the globe allowing you to see them framed by the Globetrons ribs and guidewires - it's really super cool and a view of the world that the Unisphere presaged (and survived to see).

I rode my bike their from my home in Bed Stuy - it's not difficult, though not for the feint of heart either - and having a bike gives you ready access to a very large park with tons of very nice places to picnic, or watch some very competitive soccer, play a nine hole pitch-and-putt golf course, play tennis or visit the Queens Hall of Science which has the world famous New York City Diorama which I think is a must-see for any New Yorker. I might even suggest that some egg salad sandwiches and a bottle of OCD Sauvignon Blanc would be perfect companions when you decide to go. Just don't forget you have to ride home too.

More on Queens adventures coming up including great ethnic restaurants that don't have liquor licenses.

Riesling & Lobster Rolls

For those of you who live in Brooklyn and either live in Red Hook or own one of the following: bike, motorcycle or car - you now have access to some very very tasty lobsters. The place is The Lobster Pound on Van Brunt St. - the main drag of Red Hook - and you'll be looking for a nice bit of punnery in their sign: a lobster hooked to a tow truck which is trés apropos for Red Hook as you well know if you've ever had your car towed. Anyway, these nice folks have excellent lobster and are the kind of people your relatively happy to give your hard earned TARP money to. At $9.50 per pound (yesterday), The Pound's price was only 51 cents higher than Fairway down the street and the lobsters at Fairway are the softshell kind that are raised in the aqua-projects in the Bronx - not comparable. If you think all lobsters are created equally, you are sorely mistaken. The Lobster Pound lobsters were extremely feisty - this is something you absolutely want in your lobster. The lobsters at Fairway are generally a lethargic bunch, like midwesterners after brunch at The Country Buffet - you could probably boil these people to death and they wouldn't notice either.

We returned home with 3 pound and a half lobsters for $42 and prepped the backyard for some guests. I always steam my lobsters - it's quick and easy and takes between 6 - 10 minutes depending on how many lobsters you've stuffed into your pot. I put about 2 inches of water into a large lobster part and then put a metal rack perched on a small collander to keep the lobsters out of the water. This is important because if the cold lobsters go in the water, it takes a long time to get the water boiling again and defeats the purpose of steaming. Once the water is boiling, plop those suckers into the pot and put the lid on. If you listen really carefully, you can actually hear them initially enjoying the sauna and then they start to wonder why they're really in there, and then it's too late. When done, the lobsters will be bright red and if you're in doubt, pull on an antennae and it should pull out with a little effort - not fall off on it's own, but a slight tug. Plop them in a bowl and let them cool - you can also dip them in an ice water bath if your guest are on the way. Once cool enough to handle, extract all the meat and DO NOT FORGET THE LOBSTER FAT. That's the white blobby stuff and it add FLAY-VORE! Also do not exclude body meat extraction as there is some very sweet crab-like meat in the catacombs above the legs. I add a little mayo salt and pepper to the mix and put it in the fridge.

Whence your guests have had some time to anticipate the fact that you are serving them lobster on your dime, throw some hot dog buns on the grill - I favor top split or New England style buns that offer ample exposed un-crusted bun to apply grill marks to. Lightly toast the buns and just jam pack those buns with lobster meat making sure that a few lower claw pieces and knuckles sit proud over the bun proving that you have not padded one lobster with some sea leg from the Japanese supermarket. I spritz a little lemon and tobasco on my lobster roll and am a very happy camper.

Now this is the important part: pull a bottle of OCD Riesling out of the fridge and pour a glass for all. Take a small sip at the toast to wake up the buds and then take a gnarly bit o' lobster roll and wash that down with a larger sip of Riesling. These two things in the accompaniment of summer are truly Wonder Twins. While it may seem expensive to make lobster rolls, this very packed lobster roll would cost anywhere from $15 to $28 out and about in NYC - so it's really a bargain when you consider that and it's kind of an adventure to get the lobsters and cook them. One thing is for certain - you guests will appreciate you more when you serve them lobster and OCD - especially if your normally an unrepentant asshole.

Otto Meets His People

Otto made his in store debut last week all over New York City and to celebrate, our intrepid wine chief held a tasting at her local wine merchants, Thirst, on Dekalb avenue in Ft. Green, Brooklyn. This is a compact and well designed store chock full of great wine and a fine selection of spirits like my favorite Michter’s Rye. Armed with OCD Sauvignon Blanc, OCD Pinot Noir, dry sausage, goat cheese, bread, carmelized onion spread, and a bottomless well of bon homie, Wine Chief (aka Melissa) parked herself behind Thirst’s lovely granite topped tasting table and prepared to spread the gospel of Otto. Armed with an inside out knowledge of grape, label and vine her pitch was often unneeded after the oohs and aahs that followed those sniffs and sips the fine looking folks of Ft. Green enjoyed. In two hours many happy Otto acolytes marched out into the beautiful afternoon leaving Thirst a case and a half lighter. Prepare yourself, we’re bringin’ the Otto experience to your neighborhood juice joint soon - sooner if you ask for it.

Otto's Protest Pays Off

So the New York State legislature came out on the right side of things over the weekend and decided that supermarkets selling wine was not a good idea. While good news to all wine lovers and their agents (local wine merchants), it was perilously close to going the other way - and by other way, I mean wine being turned into a commodity, stripped of personality and nuance. We as country continue a lock-step march towards banality as the masses continue to dope themselves up on fast food, fried snacks and now Red Bull. Putting wine in supermarkets would have lowered the bar for wine consumption and undoubtedly hurt liquor stores and wine stores. For many it would have been a critical blow - not to be recovered from - and leaving a gaping wound of yet another empty retail space with nothing capable of capturing enough public interest to be viable. Let's face it, the boutique store is a very endangered species right now and there are lots of lovely boutique wine shops filled with lovely wine connoisseurs waiting to help you pick out that perfect bottle to accentuate and elevate your evening. Picture that same wine in the supermarket - the gallon price tacked to the shelf edge leaving you to do the math on your 750 ml bottle - how much is this? So you ask Brittney, who's stocking the shelves, if she knows the price. She tells you that she only knows that a six pack of Mikes Hard Lemonade is $8.50 and tastes amazing. You're on your own with the wine. Thank God Brittney's not my new wine go-to-gal.

Sauvignon Blanc Bottle...

The Dream becomes Reality...

So, the wine, as I've posted, is very close to being here. Arch sales maven, Mike Barry, is upgrading the suspension on his motorcycle side car to help carry all the samples up and down the East Coast. Melissa Saunders, General Manager, is busy overseeing the million details that go into producing and launching your very own wine brand all the while skipping around the globe visiting possible future partner vineyards and expanding relationships with winemakers (as well as promoting OCD, natch!). Daniel Saunders, Finance & Strategy, is hard at work keeping the money straight and our operating strategy tight as a kettle drum - no small feat. Chris Antista (The Horse's Mouth), Creative Director, is figuring out how to make a cool website on a shoestring budget and how to tailor our message of old school, grass roots, convivial wine connoisseurship to todays market that appears to demand slavish devotion to Web/Twitter/Blog/eBlast/Facebook obsessiveness. While I agree these tools are useful, I can only agree that that's true only if the content of the aforementioned vehicles is enjoyable by the recipient - otherwise it's just spam. I get enough messages thrown at me everyday as every other non-cave-dwelling individual on this planet. We're all struggling to stay plugged in lest some generation of cyborgian computer-weened mutant kids runs us over before we get a chance to KEEP IT REAL. So what the hell am I saying? I'm going to send you the occasional email. I am going to occasional send you a link. I am occasionally going to tap OCD's friends on Facebook. When I do, though, it's going to be to share something, make you laugh, invite you to drink some wine on us or maybe just to go play some croquet and drink some wine on us. Wine is fun to drink. Wine should be fun to talk about, look at, discuss and mostly to share. We've got enough to worry about every day - let's engage in some escapist enjoyment with our friend Otto at the helm.

I've got to finish the website. I've got to produce sales material for Mike. I've got to make this whole dream work, because it's become reality now. There's 87,000 bottles of OCD heading this way and we're going to sell the all. Along the way, it is my new dream that everyone gets a little something else out of their OCD experience, as well. A lot of this is up to you, but hopefully we can inspire some with our dream. I'd love to hear back as we go.

Hullo there, Gorgeous!

So after much haranguing, hoop jumping, animal husbanding, calling card calling, beging/borrowing/stealing, browbeating, conversating, deciding, pontificating and wine drinking - our bottles are slowly washing up on our shores. Our handsome lad of a wine looks so regal on his open weave estate label and his matte finish ensures that nary a stray beam of color-sick flourescent lighting bounces off our label and touches your sensitive corneas. Good lighting doesn't hum...though I do enjoy the occasional 500 watt sodium vapor lamp in the right situation (must be those rainy Sundays spent skateboarding in parking garages in New Jersey so many years ago...alas). Back to the bottle. Not just another face in the crowd, this bottle. Intriguing, beautiful and enigmatic - OCD must be picked up to start to understand where we are coming from. We want to start a relationship between OCD and his acolytes. This starts by revealing only a little at time - first it's just a glance: yup he's looking at you. Then you pick him up and give a once over: now you know his name. OK, take him home with you, open him up and discover the next part of the story: excellent juice. Take a real gander at the label while drinking and we think you'll get the whole thing and hey, even if you don't, just love the wine. You only have to get as involved as you want - Otto's easy like that. No hard feelings.

There are NO Koala bears in New Zealand

I have found out through the grapevine that there are NO Koala bears in New Zealand! Can you imagine a country with no Koala bears!!! I mean, is there not one cuddly, razor-sharp clawed, luv-muffin of a Koala anywhere in New Zealand? No Zoo has a Koala bear in it? Is there no drug lord with a private menagerie containing one little Koala bear named Koca? The news that there is no Koala bear in New Zealand was gotten from a Kiwi, indirectly, and I sensed a huffy tone as well, perhaps because the Aussie's have sooooo many adorable animals, the Koala amongst them, and the Kiwis have, well, duh, Kiwis - there not just the people you know! The Kiwi is a flightless bird that mostly begs food from people exiting pizza parlors. I can start to see why someone would be upset about the Koala thing - it wasn't because I was being an ignoramus, it was because the people of New Zealand would really like a Koala bear of their very own. To that end I give you Koolio the Koala. No, he doesn't rap, chuckle chuckle chuckle - he's just so full of personality that they called him Koolio growing up. So this guy's for you, New Zealand, as a thank you for making so much kick ass wine and for growing the grapes for our OCD varietals -- Koolio likes a little Syrah occasionally, don'cha buddy?

Insanely Delicious Ancho Braised Short Rib Tacos

Pontification mode: off. Food mode: on.

One of the great joys of wine knowledge is the ability to pair with food so expertly that each heightens the enjoyment of the other. While our boy Otto spends most of his time dreaming of wine, one must not lose focus on the FOOD.

To this end, I share something I created the other night and I'll keep it as simple as I can. This recipe is a testament to having some interesting dried ingredients in constant supply in your kitchen and as the idea of eating dinner out continues to be bashed as the bastion of the bourgeoisie (though technically middle class, the b-word is usually associated with the affluent due to it's derivation from bougeois, french for townsmen - which was more akin to nobleman vs. peasant in the middle ages as the townsmen were land owners and capitalists). Am I a digresser or what! Tangent! Tangent!

My wife is pregnant and constantly craves flavor packed ethnic foods and to that end I am re-jiggering my kitchen tricks to include more spices and techniques to evoke more pizazz out of the oft-eaten dishes at our house. The braised short rib has been a constant dinner party trick and every couple of weeks kind of meal since it's rise to standard on every new American menu in NYC 10 years ago. It's also a very easy dish with tons of wow factor deliciousness. Here's my Pregnant Wife Craving Tacos recipe.

2 lbs thick beef short ribs
1 Large Onion, chopped coarsely
1/4 cup of Golden Raisins
3 dried Ancho chiles (available at any mexican market or better grocery)
1/4 cup of pignoli nuts (optional - especially if you've henpecked your child into having a psychosomatic nut allergy)
1 whole Star Anise pod
4 whole Cloves
1 Tsp. Coriander Seeds
2 Whole Cardamom Seeds
1/2 Tsp. Peppercorns
Any other spices you think would be awesome (chili powder, cumin, cayenne pepper etc.)
3 bay leaves
3 whole Jalapeños
1 head of garlic - remove just the loose skin and cut top off whole head, exposing some of the cloves
Corn tortillas
Guacamole - three ripe avocados, 1/4 cup packed diced Cilantro, 1 Tsp Lime juice, sea salt and pepper to taste
I add a de-seeded and diced jalapeño for kick. Mash all with a fork.
Shredded Red Cabbage.

Beans - recipe to follow

OK - Get a Creuset Dutch Oven or the like hot on the stove with some olive oil. Place your Short Ribs in the pot and brown on all sides. The short ribs can be fresh from the butcher or outta the freezer - matters not, but I do defrost them for a bit in the microwave prior to browning if frozen. Ohhh, bite me Alice Waters!!!

While browning ribs, toss one ancho chile, the nuts and all other spices listed into a coffee bean grinder or mini food processor and grind all that stuff up - it's going to make a redish, densely packed powder (because of the oil in the nuts). Scrape all that goodness out into a sauté pan and slightly toast the spice powder/paste. Keep an eye on this as it can go from toasted to just toast in a very short time and burnt is not a good flavor profile.

Turn oven on and set to 300 to 325

Once Short Ribs are brown on all sides (5 - 15 minutes depending on your idea of brown), toss in the onions and deglaze the pot with a splash of the beer. Use a wooden spoon to push things around and scrape up the bits on the bottom of the pan so they integrate with the onions and the liquid.

Once the onions are soft, throw some sea salt in the pot (I do a few pinches, you can do it to your sodium delight), crank some pepper in there, toss in the Garlic head, 2 whole dried ancho chiles, the raisins, 3 whole jalapeños, the rest of the beer and the toasted spice powder. I usually add enough water or beer or beef stock or vegetable stock at that point to not quite cover the ribs and I bring the whole mixture to a boil.

Once boiling, reduce to simmer for 15 minutes (for no good reason, really), then put the lid on it and place it in oven. Leave it in the oven for at least 3 hours, checking on it every hour and for the final hour with the lid removed so you can greatly reduce the liquid.

Towards the end of this operation, I make the Guacamole per the above recipe, make some rice (just because), and I prepare the beans. This is weekday home cooking so I use canned beans - cheap, delicious and easy.

Beans: In a small saucepan, brown a clove of garlic in some olive oil, add the beans and any liquid in the can. Throw in some salt and pepper, diced cilantro, half of a chopped onion, some tabasco, and about a half cup of the liquid from the ribs. Let simmer for 20 minutes being careful not to burn the bottom. This needs stirring fairly often.

The Ribs should pretty much fall right off the bones if they haven't already when done. I remove the Ribs, jalapeños and garlic head from the pot and then turn up the heat and reduce what's left of the liquid to a sauce consistency. You may want to skim the fat before you do this...I don't. Transfer sauce to a bowl for drizzling over taco.

Don't forget your shredded raw Red Cabbage - I use a mandolin to make a snazzy frazzle of crisp red freshness for the taco

ALSO - do not forget lime wedges to be squeezed onto the these for an acidic counterpoint to the savory overload the meat can be.

Assembly:

I usually toss the corn tortillas on the gas burners to heat as we eat, one at a time. This produces a hot, slightly charred, delicious host for the contents you've cooked. It also slows your roll a little and forces you to pace yourself which is good when something is this GD delicious.

My way: Tortilla, strip of sour cream, strip of guacamolé, rib meat (commensurate with tortilla size), beans, green hot sauce*,
cabbage, drizzle of Short Rib sauce with some raisins. If you're lucky, snag one of the cooked ancho chiles or a jalapeño for extra deliciousness.

OK, I know this post is rather useless without pictures, but trust me on this one. OUT OF CONTROL good.

By the way, if you are a sick monkey and love super hot hot sauce, try my recipe for Ring of Fire hot sauce:
5 hot peppers (scotch bonnet, habanero) that are orange, yellow and red.
1 cup of cider vinegar
1 tbs kosher salt

heat vinegar and dissolve salt. add peppers. boil vinegar/peppers until very soft (15 minutes). Dump vinegar and transfer peppers carefully (this shit is HOT) to a small food processor. Add a little oil and water and a dash of salt and blend, baby blend. Let cool and watch as your friends enjoy some of the hottest hot sauce ever...and go back for more.

Wine Braves Long Ocean Journey

Like many a Latvian hooker, OCD is coming to America. AND, like those hookers, OCD is coming via shipping container, though there are no breathing holes drilled in our container. We've also had our container painted to attract as much attention as possible as we've been reading marketing books that suggest we should garner attention at all costs. In fact, the marketing book, called "Get Rich or Go To Jail" advocates a scorched-earth philosophy to marketing in the age of the 3 second attention span.  The theory is that if your not offending the minority, you'll never sell to the majority.  The theory behind this is of course the idea of the repressed id.  We all want to listen to the devil on our shoulder, but have been brutally socialized to keep those thoughts to ourselves.  That doesn't stop us from consulting our little id or privately enjoying some of his ideas and marketers often take advantage of this virgin/whore rift within our own psyche.  I'm not sure if it's the best idea for the long run, as we constantly erode the notion of a public personae in favor of getting attention - to wit, the high school principle with 2 out of 6 abs showing a hint of definition, posting a topless shot of himself on his myspace page thinking it'll up his cool factor (or he's just trying to have sex with minors like most mouth-breathing Y chromosoids).  Anywho - as we dismantle the fourth wall, normally called civility, in favor of a relentless and shameless quest for our life-justifying 15 minutes of fame, we as a society sacrifice shared goals.  How can you have a community when it's all about me?  Am I being a prude?  Perhaps.  Do I lament the fact that an an average night of television there are approximately 20,000 bleeps inserted by censors on shows watched primarily by a younger generation?  I do.  It suggests a reversion to brutality in some ways and represents a fire sale of our future.  The dumb will embrace this roughness thinking it de rigeur while the educated will realize it's just a way for the classes to continue to migrate in opposite directions and further their own ascension through education and discipline.

Back to OCD.  So what do we do?  We need attention to sell our wine.  However, taste is a funny thing, especially when held up to a personal litmus test:  all will judge differently based on their ethos.  How are we going to market this wine?  To what ends will we go to 'get that money' as is often rapped.  I'm torn.  A business has an edict to succeed at all costs.  The bottom line is just that, but one shouldn't have to exist on the bottom of the barrel to generate that bottom line.  We're hoping the people who enjoy our wine and our gestalt are just a bit smarter than that (with apologies for my prurient attention getting first line).

So how did we decorate that container?  We did need to get some attention after all and last I checked, the nicer jails had tennis courts, softball leagues, dining rooms, excellent security and television - all without the constant worry of bills or a mortgage.  Hell, in prison you look forward to opening your mail!  That sealed it for me: (scroll down)

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Sorry - image got yanked by a loyal reader who didn't want me to damage our brand image. If you'd like to see the image, simply email me at chris@communalbrands.com and I'll send it to you. Maybe my sense of humor is a bit over the top, but the world is a crazy place, no?

Intrepid OCD wine honcho braves third-world country

In a bold and dangerous move, characteristic of her fierce helmsmanship of OCD, Melissa Saunders finds herself this week in one of the worlds most blood-thirsty banana republics: New Zealand. Packing her trusty side kick, Mr. Machete, Melissa arrived two days ago to inspect our vineyards, oversee the bottling process and gamble on underground Koala bear fights. Vicious stuff!


Upon landing it was straight to the bottling plant to deal with a sitch. A serious sitch for which blame can be spread in an even schmear across several departments and subcontractors here at Communal Brands. Unfortunately the contrast between the the name of the wine and the label color was not enough to make it pop and thus created a serious legibility issue. Take a look for yourself:



This is all a bit more complicated than it sounds, for all of you who are saying, "string up the idiot who picked red on red!" Well, that could be true and an occasional stringing up is excellent for morale as we all know, but there are some mitigating factors that should be considered. All of the files were approved for print via email, and this allowed computer monitors to show the colors as they are calibrated - never an honest color portrayal. But we knew this much, what we didn't know was that when using a matte finish on our estate style labels, the colors tend to bleed or "blend" together a bit more than on glossier labels. We know now this, but that doesn't mean that printing 50,000 replacement labels is no big deal. It's a big deal. Hell, let's string someone up. Who wants to volunteer? Anyone? How 'bout a free OCD tee shirt and you've only got to be strung up for 3 days. The x-factor that is not being mentioned here because it may be too complicated to tackle right now is that we, the OCD kids, were toying with the wine's name right up to days prior to printing (I'll address this issue later) and there were several other timing issues that put an immense amount of pressure on DECIDING AND APPROVING RIGHT NOW!!!!!! I guarantee you we will not be in this position again.

After the stress of being in a third world country and dealing with a printing screw-up with bottling mere hours away, Melissa needed to wind down a little bit. She headed to her hotel and picked up her room key using this country's quaint cubby-hole key security system. The idea works like this: the key has a name indicated on the outside of the drawer. You must then figure out which room it belongs to. This way, if you lose your key, noone will know which door it opens. Kind of brilliant really. Here's the cubby-master, as it's called, at the hotel Melissa is staying at:



For those interested, Melissa has the "Influenza Powder" key which matched up to the "Eloper's Suite". Exciting stuff down there in New Zealand! Such an interesting land and peoples about which we here at Otto's Current Discussion, hope to reveal more of it's bizarre secrets as we continue on this journey.

That's all for today - I'm as buggered form writing about this as Melissa was from experiencing it. Hopefully she'll chirp a little about her Vineyard tour. I'm personally looking forward to it.

THM aka PK aka TC aka FRTC aka Chris

Welcome to Otto's blog

Soooooo, it's offiicial.  I've finally become relevant - new millenium style:  I've put solar panels on my dog and use him to charge my cell phone while on walks around  my neighborhood.  Man, the gangsters on the corner almost pissed themselves when they saw Frank (my pitbull) rolling down the block with a photovoltaic array on his head, back, and tail.  Sample mockery, "Yo, he look mad stupid, yo!!!  Who rocks that shit in public, yo??!!!??"  I later learned through a crackhead I'm friendly with that they were actually mocking the traditional Hmong knitted cap I was wearing (a momento of my South Asia adventure, thank you very much) and not Frank, who was happily loping along, charging my cell phone, oblivious to the mockery - or he probably knew they were busting on me.  

Anyway, this is tangential to what is really making me relevant:  I've started bringing my own bags to the grocery store in my transitional brooklyn nabe.  I am doing my part on a daily basis to reduce my carbon footprint and confound every cashier at the Super Foodtown: "You know the bags are free, right?"  Yes, Taneesha, I know the bags are free, but clean air isn't, you know.  "Whachoo mean?  Air is free, stoopid.  Do you have your club card?"  I never have my club card, but someone else usually lets me use theirs which is a win-win - I get the discounts and they get the points which after a year is usually enough to get a head of lettuce totally for free.  

Sorry - I am totally new to the blogging thing, which by the way is totally passé now that you've got to Twitter.  I'm starting to feel like my parents trying to program the VCR in '85.  Where was I, oh yeah, the previous two examples are evidence of my conscientiousness, not relevance.  Committing my thoughts to the binary library in the sky for all eternity is what makes me relevant...if people read it.  What a big if.  I guess the catharsis of writing is enough to make it worth while, but wouldn't some hate e-mail make it more worthwhile?  Or perhaps my blog entries will in some way make some kid with cancer want to persevere: "The Horse's Mouth would fight, [cough, cough...wheeze].  I'll take the llama bone marrow!  I just know we're a match! [sputter, cough, wheeze]."  That wasn't funny.  I know, I was just pandering to the hate mail people.  Would SOMEONE please acknowledge me?  

Right.  So this is a blog for our wine.  Our wine tastes good and like any wine, if you drink enough of it, you may become idiotic.  This is the area that my blog is going to focus on:  what fun can one have in any situation?  There's always something funny about a situation and my blog entries for OCD are going to try to find the humor in between the knock down, drag out fights we at OCD and Communal Brands are going to be having in making our dreams come true.  I also intend to talk about the creative process in designing our label and marketing in to the world at large, that is currently distracted by global badness - a perfect time for a laugh and a glass of our Pinot Noir.  More to come.